Tuesday, January 8, 2008

The Kindness of others...

I continue to be amazed at the kindness Joe and I have been shown since the loss of Autumn. When we first found out she was sick I wanted to hide it and was embarrassed that I was carrying an imperfect child. Soon though I was showing and had to "come out" and it was honestly a relief to not have to hide it. I can't imagine how I would have gotten through it without others. It was silly of me. Just when I thought things were calming down in her regard I've had four days in row where we've received something in her memory. People are so good, and just so caring. It's really been a growing experience for me. I think Joe and I are doing amazingly well and I know that it's because of the love that we've been shown. I'm just so grateful for everything!

I still have my downer moments of course but thankfully they are infrequent. I need to edit my Babycenter profile, every Monday I get my new email. Yesterday's stated that I was 21 weeks pregnant and our baby was probably dancing the night away moving about 50 times an hour. That was the most awesome thing about expecting, feeling that little bugger move. I know I shouldn't read them but I just like to hear how things would be if we had a different outcome. I get angry about the whole thing when I think about being almost 1/2 way through it when she died. You are pregnant for what seems like forever; I know in the grand scheme of life it's not long but when it comes to pregnancy I'm the most impatient person there is. And not because pregnancy is hard on me physically because it's not, but I just can't wait for that baby to get here and be a part of my family. And another thing, I'm surrounded by pregnant people & babies and it's driving me insane! ;) Not really, but come on. My best friend delivered in October, another friend & my niece delivered in November, I have another friend due in February, one of Joe's coworkers just had a baby last week. I'm seriously happy for these people, especially two of the couples who waited years and had fertility treatments before finally conceiving. I know I need to consider myself lucky that I have my two boys but darn it I want my May baby!

I quickly ground myself from these crazy feelings when I think of how bad things could be. One poor lady on my CP board lost her son this weekend. He was a little younger than Austin and battled a long time. I can't imagine going through that horror. So for you praying people if you could keep Anna and her family in your prayers I know she would appreciate it.

*** A few tidbits!

I think poor Joe might be sick because he brought me a beer he opened to drink. He is on a diet and while the beer sounded good after a wild night teaching the cub scouts I guess he decided he didn't want it/need it afterall.

I've made it all 5 days to school early. It's great and I'm on a roll! I'm also helping Joe get to work on time in the process! Yay!

Global warming officially hit MI yesterday as the mercury hit 60. I took my students for a walk without coats. They were nuts yesterday!

I beat GH3 medium the other night! Joe says I have no life! Ha, he's just jealous!

And I almost forgot the most important thing of all. My cleaning lady returns from vacation on Thursday! THANK THE LORD!!!!!!!!!! It's been 4 weeks since our house was cleaned and it needs it desperately!

13 comments:

Angie said...

Congrats on getting to school early every day last week! Awesome! I'm glad the kindness of others has helped keep your spirits up. I can only imagine how emotionally draining life has been for you lately, but you seem to be doing great!

Joe said...

I had some issues posting a link...

Anyway - I am not impressed by your GH3 abilities anymore... Check this kid out...

Click Here

BTW - Thanks to Todd for sending me this link :)

* ~ *Jessica* ~ * said...

Youve beat medium?! WTG!!! I'm not checking out Joe's link. I think you ROCK!
You're doing great on your 2008 resolution! Woohoo!!!!
You seem to be doing wonderful! I'm glad you have so many great people in your life to help you through tough times! You appear so upbeat about things. You are my role model :)

Joe said...

Jessica...

How can you disregard my link? C'mon it is awesome :)

Debbie said...

WTG Dawn on your GH!!! I want to see you in action ;)

Dawn said...

Woo hoo! Thanks girls for the support, I'm a GH3 coolie! I need the original and GH2 though. I want new songs!

Joe - My students all knew about that 9 year old.

Oh and for the record, I'm still going strong for my NYR. It was tough to get up today though. I'm hoping for a snow day tomorrow. It's pouring rain right now, just need it to freeze. ;) Then I can stay home and play all day on the internet with you all.

sherri and Adam said...

Dawn,

I am so glad I e-mailed you yesterday. I sure have missed you all so much. I'm really glad you shared your blog site with me. I am not into blogging yet, maybe some day. I seriously just sat here for 4 hours, reading your whole blog, and posting a comment about Drew's skating party (go check it out, LOL). I sat here and cried when I read about your precious baby girl. I honestly had no idea, and didn't realize how out of the loop I truly was. I miss you guys like you wouldn't believe. Seeing Austin and Tommy yesterday, if only for a few moments, was awesome. Austin is getting way too big!!! I am glad to hear they are both doing wonderful in school. Please send me some pics of your precious baby girl, via e-mails, if your comfortable enough. Also, I'd love to make it to some of Tommy's hockey games, so please send a schedule, if possible. Drew is playing 5th grade basketball. No games yet, just lots of practice. Well after reading for 4 hours, I better get cleaning. Bryce will be 6 on Sunday, and we will have a housefull. That was suppose to be one of my goals this am, while the boys were at school, but I was too into your blog. Now that I am caught up, I'll make sure I check your blog often. It's wonderful to read what you guys are up to. Please keep in touch. We need to get the boys together soon!!! Hugs and kisses,
Sherri

Dawn said...

Sherri - Thanks for the sweet comment! You have mail! Glad you are doing well and the boys too! We will definitely get together soon.

Mary said...

You must be a cool teacher, sharing tips with the middle schoolers over GH3! I'm sorry to hear about the loss of Autumn but it sounds like you have some great fmaily and friends around you.

Kelly said...

Hello up there! Isn't it amazing how many people show their kindness in times like this? I know I was truly amazed too! By the way, I just posted. And don't give me too much credit on the songs, I stole them from "Lucy's Mom" from BC. I am not sure how she felt about that, I told her and she didn't reply. But you are certainly welcome to them! I am glad you are healing! Sounds like you are doing great!
K

Amy said...

Hi Dawn! I am doing well. Thanks for commenting on my site. I know only a few people read it, but it is nice to see they do. The honeymoon period for back to school is over. This week, two were suspending and one (expelled) transfer revoked due to behavior issues. I am really sure that the stress from that class didn't help with my miscarriage. I can't wait for my change of assignment in March! Hope your week went well at school. And, thanks for the nice comments. You were a role model for me as I was dealing with my own misfortune. I thought if Dawn can do that-- then I can do this. Of course, all of my strength is from God-- I am realizing that more and more each day.
Amy
Amy

Dawn said...

Mary - I swear I looked at that school pic forever last night trying to figure out what was off about it. I must have been tired because it's crystal clear today. That is too funny! I wouldn't say I'm cool but I do get along very well with my kids. I'm happy that they keep me in the loop somewhat.

Kelly - I don't know if I'll steal your songs or not. It might make my dial-up friends crazy. Of course they should just get in the now and get high speed internet!

Amy - Hearing your stories makes me love my job even more. I'm glad you'll be moving in March. I can't believe the crud you get from 4th graders!!! Thank you for the kind words, you're too sweet. But remember you helped me too when I was struggling. I always know I have my faith to catch me when things get really tough; it's all in God's hands. I hope March comes quickly for you.

* ~ *Jessica* ~ * said...

Ok, Joe- I'll cave. I'll check out the link. But, Dawn still kicks GH Butt :) How can you compete with a 9 y/o gamer?! LOL